I have been looking at my computer screen for over an hour, F5-ing every few minutes to make sure I don't miss the news I'm anticipating: Passage of a landmark healthcare reform bill in Congress.
I expected this to happen. I prayed for it, signed petitions, wrote and called my representatives in Congress. I expected this to happen, but I did not expect to feel so... conflicted when it finally arrived.
Some thoughts on how I feel right now:
Elated that health care coverage will be accessible to millions of previously uncovered Americans.
Proud that America sees the need to make health care available to all and has caught up to the rest of the industrialized world.
Disgusted with the Republican leadership that has shown no leadership on this issue and has instead screamed, "Socialism!" and "Death Panels!" and "Assault on Freedom!" at every single turn, and at the marriage of the GOP and the religious right that has caused the passage of this bill providing health care access to be cast as an assault on our religious liberty.
Grieved at the lack of respect for one another, on both sides of the issue, that hinders any chance for civil discussion, and also at the sincere worry and pain that the passage of this bill will cause to my brothers and sisters on the opposing side of the debate.
Shocked at the hateful things that are coming from the mouths of Christians, wishing pain and bodily harm and even death upon supporters of this bill.
Hopeful that, though we are divided, that as people of faith, we will find a way to stop shouting at each other and work together to make this system work.